Thursday, August 16, 2012

How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It

       

       

       

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Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Why Did I Marry You Anyway?: Overcoming the Myths That Hinder a Happy Marriage

        Wouldn't it be nice to have a marriage counselor for a friend? And wouldn't it be nice to have a friend as a marriage counselor? Everyone is who is married-happily or aspiring to be happy-needs to continually examine and reinforce all those wonderful positive reasons you chose your mate...and chose to stay with your mate for all those days, months, years, decades...lifetimes. Marriage isn't easy or perfect. It's a special relationship that you have to work hard to make work.

       

       

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Tuesday, July 31, 2012

MARRIAGE



  • When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

    She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

    I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

    She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

    The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

    In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

    This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

    She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door every morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

    My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outsidethe door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

    On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

    She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me...she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

    Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

    I drove to office....jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

    She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

    Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

    At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.

    My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we pushed thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband.

    The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

    If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you. If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

    --Thank you Solomon.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Veterans Abroad: IMBRA Law - International Marriage Broker Regulation Act: Bint Jabel: Capital of Hezbollah About to Fall

MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP REINFORCEMENT STRATEGIES

It is truism that several factors can cause a relationship to collapse. It can be as a result of  insincerity from either of the couple,lifestyle,finance,communication and so on.
According to Bob Harrison marriage relationship can be cemented through significant reinforcement strategies. The following are Relationship Reinforcement Strategies:

1. COMMUNICATION: Learn to listen carefully not just to the words being expressed,but also to the feelings behind the words.

2. AWARENESS: Become more aware of each other's needs and desires.

3. PLAYING TOGETHER: Have fun and share pleasurable times with each other. schedule recreational activities that both of you enjoy.

4. ESCAPE: Periodically, break your normal schedules and routines of life. Take trips together to dream spots. Disappear for a long lunch or a weekend away together.

5. PRAISE: Nourish each other's egos and self-image through positive affirmations and sincere praise.

 6. ROMANCE: Never stop dating. Practice being kind and caring to one another. Schedule quiet time for the two of you.

7. WORSHIP: Share common spiritual experiences. This will add depth,power and intimacy to your relationship.
I strongly believe if you practice the above strategies stated by Bob Harrison,your marriage will experience heaven on earth.
Check this out for further reading: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Special-Discount-For-You/350260091662452

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Happiness and Marriage



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Sunday, February 19, 2012

Love, Honor, & Consequence Best Price



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Doyle Tafiti: I bought this Love, Honor, & Consequence from this website last week. Up to this moment, I am happy with this guy.

Bobette Vanstee: I have been using this Love, Honor, & Consequence for 1 week now. Nice built quality.

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Saturday, February 18, 2012

Storm Cloud Marriage (Bestseller Romance S.)



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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

ENJOYING PEACE IN MARRIAGE

A Peaceful Marriage Starts Outside of Your Marriage

The root of all peace is God. But not the God that most of us imagine. The God that I am referring to is the one who has laid aside the rules to keep you out and has embraced you through sacrificial actions. First, He sacrificed His position and became like us. He became human. He wanted to be intimately involved in the human experience. Second, He took our place and accepted the responsibility to establish a relationship with us by redeeming us from our fallen condition. 1 John 4:19 is one of those critical truths that becomes the foundation of a peaceful relationship with others.

"We love because He first loved us."

The beauty and power of that short sentence is astounding! As I realize that I am deeply loved by God, I am empowered to love others. The root of a peaceful marriage is in discovering and emotionally experiencing the love of God. This love is not a mere academic or theological fact. It is a real, practical, and powerful fact. When I realize how much God loves me and experience that love personally I will find myself loving my spouse with a love that transcends my fickle emotions and unstable swings from day to day. For example, your wife says something that sends you into an emotional torrent of self-defense and irritation. Your first reaction is to verbally defend yourself and prove your point and jab back with a few critical comments of your own.

You counter her attack with a verbal left jab by reminding her of a few of her mistakes from a few weeks, months or years back. The whole situation escalates from there. We've all been there and done that. But as you spend time meditating and pondering upon the awesome fact that God loves you so much that He died for you. That He believes in you and in your wife. As you become emotionally established in how much He loves you, you find that the approval or disapproval of others, including your spouse, doesn't have as much power over you as it used to. Now you are free to love. From the foundation of a consistent love from God you are able to consistently love others. Your love is now based on an eternal and supernatural source rather than a human and unstable source.